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If you’re a Millennial or just new to the hosting game,  it can be a little scary to host your first Thanksgiving or another holiday dinner. You want to have fun, but you also want to make sure everything goes right. And you’re probably worried about following proper etiquette—which can be hard to do when it feels like it’s always changing.

What are the current rules of etiquette when hosting…and what are some antiquated rules you can forget about today?

I was honored to be interviewed for this Apartment Therapy publication (New York City) article.


Former Holiday Faux Pas That Are Totally Acceptable in 2017

By Brittney Morgan From Apartment Therapy

If you’re new to the hosting game, especially if you’re hosting your first Thanksgiving or another holiday dinner or party, it can be a little scary. You want to have fun, but you also want to make sure everything goes right. And you’re probably worried about following proper etiquette—which can be hard to do when it feels like it’s always changing.

“To be honest, etiquette is all about making those around you feel comfortable, so it’s normal that some things change over the course of time,” explains etiquette expert Lisa Grotts. “But, good table manners will never go out of style.”

That’s exactly why we reached out to etiquette experts (including Grotts) to find out which outdated rules you no longer need to follow this holiday season. The good news: everything’s a lot more casual now, so you can focus on having a good time.

You don’t have to send paper invitations

According to licensed etiquette expert Rachel Wagner, sending invitations via the internet used to be considered impersonal, but now it’s fine. “It’s more acceptable today, especially for young people who live and work by their mobile phones and keep electronic calendars versus paper calendars,” Wagner says. So go ahead, make that Facebook event. And if you’re a guest, make sure you actually respond—it’s important for the host to know how to plan, Wagner explains.

You can play music during dinner

“Gone are the days of complete musical silence,” says international business etiquette expert Sharon Schweitzer. In fact, a little music in the background can help make things less awkward—just make sure it’s right for the occasion. “Let the music be unobtrusive and appropriate, [and] stay away from unseasonal or high-volume genres,” Schweitzer says.

Your table settings can be simple

“It used to be that the table would be set to the nines with all of the plates and glasses,” explains event planner Alexandria Proko. But you can totally keep things casual now. “Today, it’s much more common that the table be set with a beautiful centerpiece, place settings and perhaps a cute place card for each guest,” Proko says. She also suggests that hosts set up a bar in another room (it’s better for mingling, anyway) and skip putting out wine glasses at the table.

You don’t have to do everything for your guests

Just because it’s the holidays, doesn’t mean you need to throw a traditional sit-down dinner. “In the past, hosts would want to do everything and keep their guests uninvolved but now it’s standard to have guests around the kitchen while the host cooks at an island or standing around the kitchen table,” says national etiquette expert Diane Gottsman, adding that it’s totally okay to have a serve-yourself bar.

You don’t have to use fancy silverware and dishes

Along with keeping your table simple and having a “serve yourself” option, Gottsman says it’s fine to use paper products at your soiree. And according to international etiquette consultant Julia Esteve, you don’t even have to use real silverware. “Historically, fine silverware was imperative to show one’s social standing,” says Esteves, noting that now it’s not really necessary. If you’d rather have a casual party with a holiday buffet, go for it….


For the Full Article Visit My Friends At Apartment Therapy